I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
foreskin is a definite game changer
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
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