I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
