Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Randomize
