He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
