I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize