every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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