I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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