Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
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i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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