so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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