you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
