YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
