Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
