So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
