the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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