i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Randomize
