I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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