Reggie can tackle my bush.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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