using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
