It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
