belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
All I want is dick and wine.
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