um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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