Need sex. Gaining weight.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize