Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
