so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Do vagina's smell?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
