Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I'm so fucking centered right now
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
