Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
