She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Randomize