Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize