I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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