I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
