I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
