I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
