Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
