I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
