nut hugger
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
