erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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