Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
