No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize