That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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