singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
now i know why i became what i already was.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
