At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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