3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
