i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
