if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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