Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Randomize
