No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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