How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
