Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize