They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Randomize
