did you get engaged???
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
