dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
